Proficiency 2: Love Based Decisions
Written by Lady Monique Jordan, Tacoma, Washington (Dual State West)
As I promised, I am coming to you this week with information, a few questions and a task. Your proficiency goal (should you choose to accept it) is as follows:
Incorporate “Love-based Decisions” in Your Daily Living this Week
Before we begin with our lesson, lets look at two unproductive games that we as people play. These games hinder us from making healthy decisions for ourselves and keep us negatively interacting with others.
Refuse to engage in unproductive games!
1. The "Victim/Rescuer/Persecutor Syndrome" requires three people: a victim, persecutor, and rescuer
In this game, the three people are involved in an unending argument and constantly switching roles. The purpose of switching roles in this game is to keep the problem unsolved, keep productive decisions unmade, and remain negatively connected to each other.
2. The "Yeah But Syndrome" requires two or more people: the answer man and the refuter
One person is constantly seeking advice from one or more people and when solutions are offered, the refuter’s response is always, "yeah but!" the purpose of this game is to keep the “yeah but” person from moving forward, (remaining a victim) and inhibits that person from making decisions.
Note: These games are easy for us to fall into. Most of us have learned them or seen them played. They can feel quite comfortable for us when we are not mindful. However, they are a phenomenal waste of time and are not conducive to making love-based decisions. The key to avoiding any mindless process is to identify the roles we unconsciously fall into.
My personal questions (prayer fuel) for the week:
- What games do I play to avoid making important decisions in my life?
- Which role would my family members, my co-workers, associates, or I, say I usually take when handling responsibilities: proactive, reactive, or inactive?
- Do I rest, eat responsibly, exercise, stay away from unnecessary drugs/stimulants?
- Do I attend church whenever possible?
- Do I pray, read or listen to my Bible regularly?
- Am I afraid to make a decision due to what (mom, dad, uncle, whomever) will say about my choice?
- Do I make decisions out of: anger, fear, revenge, resentment, shame, lust, or jealousy?
Self reflections:
1. When my decisions are love-based, I become well taken care of because the Lord is my Shepard therefore I am:
- Nurtured
- Supported
- Encouraged
- Empowered
2. When my decisions are love based, there is no fear! Therefore I have:
- Rest
- Peace
- Strength
- Joy
- Genuine praise
If all of the above attributes are not flowing in your life, keep reading for prescription:
Use this Pain Medicine Devotional Exercise this Week:
P R E S S!
Praise, repeat essential scriptures, sing songs.
Psalms 63:3 because your loving kindness is better than life, my lips shall praise thee.
1 John 4:18 there is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love. Romans 8:28 and we know that all things work together for good to them that love god, to them who are the called according to his purpose. 2 Timothy 1:7 for God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and love, and of a sound mind. Galatians 5:22: but the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, John 14:15: if ye love me, keep my commandments. Add your own scriptures to this mix!
Healing Gospel songs: by Fred Hammond (click to hear the song)
The above is a devotional package that helps reset our minds. It is optional, and strongly suggested. These scriptures & songs have been a part of an awesome journey in my life! Let me know if any of these bless you! Add yours to the mix!
Pray saints! May all of your decisions be love-based!
Stay tuned for Proficiency #3 on Spiritual Housecleaning.